A Case for Censorship: Underwear and the Subway Station

Censorship strives to stifle creativity and conversation and is generally a terrible thing that I do not condone under any circumstances EXCEPT THIS ONE:

I commute every morning from my apartment in Chinatown, Manhattan to my job in Hoboken, New Jersey. To get to the great Garden State I take the PATH train, which is actually much nicer than the New York City subway. Their whole system is nicer than ours, actually. It’s cleaner because it’s illegal to eat or drink in their stations (so disasters like THIS don’t happen), and they also have these cool looking TVs! Which wouldn’t last a night in an NYC station. The guy drawing these mustaches would have a very nice addition to his man cave and probably be a shoo-in for this year’s super bowl party host pick amongst his friends.

But, before you all try to get jobs in Jersey so you can make the reverse commute on the PATH and enjoy the vastly superior amenities available on the Jersey public transportation system, you should know that the TVs are only cool in theory. They all show the same series of advertisements on a loop. Some of the advertisements, like the trying-too-hard-to-be-cool segment “Talk Stoop” are disguised as programming, but don’t be fooled. That is most definitely still an ad, if only one for the full version of the show.

Talk Stoop is not my least favorite by a long shot. My least favorite is a series of underwear ads run by a company, ironically, whose name escapes me now. The basic gist of them is, there’s a series of beautiful women wearing nothing but their underwear, making sexy faces at the camera. I’ve seen these ads almost every morning on my way to work and each time these nearly-nude women pop up I think, “Really? It’s 8  o’clock in the morning and you think I’m interested in making the decision to purchase lingerie?”

The worst part about it is being forced to watch underwear ads with the many male passengers on the train.  We’re a captive audience of strangers and it’s uncomfortable for everyone involved, except for that one guy who’s shamelessly staring at the ads with an intensity that tells me he must be very carefully considering whether he should opt for bikini-cut or boy-short panties.

Anyway, it’s the worst. I don’t believe in censorship, but I’d take to the streets if it meant the PATH station would stop running this stupid ad. It’s not doing the public transportation ambiance any favors, and as soon as I remember the name of the company advertising this underwear, I am so boycotting it for all of eternity and forever after that!

Activism for the win, everyone!

**Update: Victoria’s Secret is the culprit. Why am I not surprised? That saucy minx. How I love and loathe you… In all honesty, this changes things; the boycott potentially will not last forever and all of eternity.

The advertisement is available here. FYI, it’s probably not safe for work. Watch without sound to get the full-scale effect of the creepiness. Just imagine yourself next to that guy who breathes really hard at the gym. Yes. Now you have it. That’s EXACTLY how creepy and awful watching these ads on the train is. #endrant

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